In the Vedic tradition of India, the Holy Trinity of Gods are Brahma the Creator, Vishnu the Sustainer and Shiva the Destroyer. Shiva, like Kali, is the deity who represents the destruction of illusion… negating anything that separates us from the truth of who we are. Whether in the Divine Game of relationship or in the personal cycles of transformation throughout our lives,
Shiva is the great destroyer who helps us transform and surrender to our true nature.
In Tantra we hear Shiva and his consort Shakti, referred to as the Divine Couple; the ultimate union of masculine and feminine. However, if we look deeper, the Shiva/Shakti sexual union is not just about the meeting of yoni and lingams with a couple of namastes thrown in for good measure. In the Vedic tradition, the Shiva Lingam and the Yoni symbolize the sacred union of the inactive and dynamic aspects of consciousness. So the desire to be in Union with our partner represents the fundamental desire to be in union with the Beloved or our true nature (consciousness).
Shiva represents the unmanifest stillness from which Shakti emanates. This is why we see images of Kali with his foot on the upside down Shiva. It’s not about subjugating the masculine to the feminine… it’s just reminding us of the divine game. From the inactive Divine Consciousness of Shiva arises the active Divine Energy of Shakti which gives form to that consciousness. The Divine interaction between Shiva/Shakti, Yin/Yang, male/female shows us that neither can exist without the other.
We embody Shiva in our lives when we connect with the stillness and silence that are at the heart of who we are. Shiva’s realm is about being and not doing. Shiva represents being in integrity with oneself and being present to others from a place of grounded stillness. In the Divine Man/Woman game, this is what Shakti really needs… the foundation of Silence from which he can create. When a man embodies Shiva, he exudes inner strength, rootedness and stillness. This allows Shakti, his Divine Consort, the freedom to shape this stillness.
When a man cannot embody Shiva, his Shakti cannot be given to him because she herself has to embody Shiva. This is at the core of much of the suffering that occurs in relationships. It does not matter if we are male or female, heterosexual or homosexual, since the same Divine Play between Shiva and Shakti (inactive Divine Consciousness and active Divine Energy) exists in all forms of relationship.
In Vedic astrology, Shiva is represented by the planet Saturn, sometimes known as the Lord of Karma. Saturn, like Shiva, ultimately represents the negation of false identifications that are associated with a limited sense of self. Saturn aspects in the birth chart, on the personality level, represent the main impression we have experienced around separation consciousness. This imprint does not represent who we really are, but rather the contracted identifications that we have assumed in order to survive.
Since Saturn corresponds to the first chakra that represents basic survival needs, the fear of survival shows up differently for each individual depending on their first impressions and circumstances. It can manifest as fear of being seen, fear of expressing emotion, fear of telling the truth, fear of giving or receiving love, or fear of acting or asserting yourself. For example, on a personality level, fear of being seen could prevent a person from truly shining her light and giving her gift to the planet. However, on a soul level, this can be an opportunity to learn about true modesty or humility. However, the challenge is to see Saturn or Shiva as our spiritual ally instead of our pursuer.
The planet Saturn takes approximately 28.5 years to circumnavigate the zodiac, which means that every seven years after birth, Saturn (by transit in the sky) is in a significant aspect or relationship to the position of Saturn at birth. At approximately 7, 21, 35, 49, and 63, Saturn is square (90 degrees to your natal position). At approximately 14, 42, and 70, Saturn is at opposition (180 degrees from your natal position). And at approximately 28.5-29 and 57-58, Saturn is conjunct (0 degrees or conjunct your natal position), also known as Saturn Return.
These seven-year cycles represent the shedding of false identifications with limited or contracted notions of self. Although our identity seems solid (father, mother, son, daughter, lover, employee, rich/poor, etc.), in truth, none of these identifications represent who we really are. As we move through the seven-year Saturn/Shiva cycles, it can sometimes feel like something we value or identify with is being taken away from us. Although normally what is being removed are false identifications that no longer serve us. This is the true power of Saturn and Shiva… to destroy or deny what is false so that we can be in integrity with our true nature. By destroying any illusion of separation we were imprinted with, we discover our true Shiva nature, which is stillness, power and presence.
The power of doing this work in sacred relationship or association is that our relationships are direct mirrors of our internal states and reflect exactly where we experience separation. The deepest intimacy (in-to-me-see) comes from sharing where we feel apart with our partner… our deepest vulnerability, secrets, and fears. When that “in-I-see” is combined with the intimacy of Tantra as a path of Union with the Divine, the relationship rises to a new level of experience. When we truly acknowledge and share our humanity with our partner and embrace and experience our divinity together, the relationship becomes the highest path of transformation possible.
