No two people or two relationships are the same. However, there are still common problems that most people face that create challenges and conflicts within a marriage or other long-term interpersonal relationship. So taking a look at the most common causes of divorce provides important insight into what’s going on in the world at large, and perhaps, in turn, in your own life as well.
A study by the Institute of Divorce Financial Analysts found six common causes of divorce in a survey. At the top of the list was incompatibility, with 43% of the total. Now this is a trap that could represent a wide range of more specific reasons. In some cases, the incompatibility could be due to communication problems or inability to get along or coexist peacefully, in others, it can represent different life priorities, a change in those priorities, and many other reasons.
The second most frequently cited cause of divorce was infidelity. This category got 28% of the total and also included what was defined as other sexual topics. So this could also refer to a general sexual incompatibility, a lack of physical attraction or sexual interest, decrease or cessation of sexual activity, etc. Beyond one partner cheating on another, there are other issues at play here as well, though sometimes they end up happening in the same scenarios, one causing another.
Money problems and arguments were the third common cause listed, at 22%. This is an area that comes up again and again in marriages. It is a cause of stress on both a personal and interpersonal level, and has a wide range of other related issues, such as job status, career path, spending habits, and money priorities as well. That means that even for a couple with some level of financial security, how they choose to spend that money matters, too. Whether it’s investing it, paying down debt, prioritizing vacations or other forms of available spending, saving for retirement, buying a home, etc.
Emotional or physical abuse was the fourth most common cause of divorce, accumulating 5.8% of the total survey. While most of us think about physical abuse, it’s also important to consider the serious negative consequences of ongoing or long-term emotional abuse.
Two other causes were mentioned, with parenting problems and addiction problems, including alcoholism. Each of these got less than 1% of the total.
If any of these sound familiar to you, they are certainly representative of most problems we face in relationships. The numbers will surely vary in other surveys or with different sample sizes, and other causes may also be included. It’s also worth noting that many of these problems are interrelated, with one leading to or causing another.
For anyone who may be facing a divorce, it is important that you do everything you can to prepare. Speak to a qualified legal representative in your local area who will be able to advise you on the best way to proceed. As these common causes of divorce show, you’re certainly not alone, whatever it is that’s specifically bringing you to this point in time.
