To position yourself for a good sandbox game, you can’t retreat to your corner and turn your back on the challenges that make you feel like doing exactly that – turning your back.
You must face the circumstance.
Withdrawing is not a sign of weakness, in fact, building a ‘golden bridge’ for someone to reframe their retirement from a tough stance to be open to your ideas is a technique that will help you keep moving towards a better solution. .
For example, you can ask for their opinions or ideas, give them options to choose from, or let them know that you are open to continuing to seek solutions together.
Take advantage of their input with your ideas.
This strategy could help them to own part of the agreement process and to keep up appearances with their colleagues and counterparts.
One thing I learned from the Harvard Leadership and Negotiation Program is that when it comes to difficult negotiations, people often want to “save face” with their colleagues and counterparts. Although it is important to keep up appearances and look good to yourself and others, it is especially difficult when the parties to the relationship or negotiation have taken a tough stance.
Another example is my friend Bernie from the Ford dealership down the road from where I live. You mailed a card to a customer who, after comparing prices, decided not to buy his car from Bernie. The card had a gold bridge across the front and the inscription encouraged the gentleman to consider the Ford dealer if he ever needed another car. The man arrived the following week and bought his wife a car, saying he thought Bernie would have bothered with him for shopping elsewhere, but the card proved otherwise.
There is always a win-win solution when looking for the best and best for all parties involved. If you can’t find your way, give me a call, because the high cost of conflict can be avoided and the profits can be used for better things.
