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69 dirty talk messages to improve your texting life

The ability to text from ANYWHERE on the planet is something new and gives relationships something they’ve never had before… the ability to keep our relationships exciting, even if we’re apart from our lovers.

Now the hard part is trying to be creative and erotic on your own. Whereas sometimes it just rolls off the tongue, and coming up with what to say is pretty easy. Other times, you may receive a sexy text and be flabbergasted at how to respond.

Below is a list of dirty messages to use when you can’t see the person you love and your goal is to make them think OBSESSED with you and the fact that they can’t have you right now.

Some of these dirty messages are funny, some are serious, so use them wisely and don’t use them haphazardly. Sometimes the humor when you’re having a very sexy conversation can spoil the mood.

1. Hello. i’m hot

2. I just thought how amazing you are. And how cool I am. Let’s connect!

3. If you were the new McDonald’s burger, you’d be McSexy!

4. You are so sexy!!

5. I love you right now.

6. The thought of you excites me!

7. Can you send me a photo to show Santa what I want for Christmas?

8. I can’t wait to see you later

9. You are SO sexy

10. I love your body

11. I’ve been thinking about you ALL day

12. You make me want to do BAD things to you… and myself 😉

13. I’m so h*rd/w3t right now

14. I would give anything to be with you right now!

15. I’ll be waiting for you later… naked 😉

16. You can do whatever you want

17. The fact that I can’t have you right now makes me want you MORE

18. What would YOU do to me?

19. I have never been so turned on by someone!

20. I have NEVER loved someone the way I love you

21. You would look so sexy if you fuck her 🙂

22. Nobody makes me like you!

23. I want you so much that I don’t notice anyone else

24. I have never met someone who turns me on like you do!

25. You have the best a$$ on the planet, is it real?

26. Hey, I just realized this, but you look so much like my next girlfriend/boyfriend!

27. What are you wearing?

28. Your body makes me happy

29. I’m not wearing underwear… maybe I can wear you later

30. Hello, I am a thief and I am here to steal your heart.

31. Can I be your slave tonight?

32. Do you know that the color of your hair and the color of my pillow match perfectly?

33. God must have been in a very good mood the day we met.

34. I think I might fall head over heels in bed with you.

35. I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand.

36. I wonder what our children will be like.

37. I’d like to name a multiple orgasm after you!

38. I will cook you dinner if you cook me breakfast.

39. I have a condom with your name on it.

40. Picture this, you, me, bubble baths, and a bottle of champagne.

41. What do you like for breakfast?

42. Why don’t you surprise your roommate and come home tonight?

43. Will you marry me just for one night?

44. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money? 😉

45. Don’t be so picky… I wasn’t! just kidding i love you

46. ​​You love me. I can smell it.

47. Damn…your ass is fine! Do you want to come see mine?

48. You are like pizza. Even when you are bad, you are good.

49. I would lose my wallet just to see you right now

50. I’m in one of those ‘you could do whatever you want’ moods, too bad you’re not here.

51. Do you have grapes? (No.) So how about a date?

52. Milk is good for the body, but damn, how much did you drink?

53. Do you sleep on your stomach? (If I can not?

54. You so good!

55. I say Deja vu last night all over again later?

56. Hello. My name is (name). I’ll be your toy tonight.

57. Are you a virgin? (No.) Try it!

58. My bedroom has a very interesting ceiling…

59. So what did you think of me last night? Pretty fantastic, huh?

60. You are on my list of things to do tonight.

61. OH GOD! OH GOD! Just practicing 😉

62. Do you know how to use a whip? eh eh

63. I’m drunk 🙂

64. Nobody told you that you wanted to sleep with me??? I thought you knew!

65. Hey girl, do you want to get LUCKY!?

66. Your house or mine?

67. You will *come* home with me tonight (Jedi mind trick)

68. I’m gay, do you think you can convert me?

69. I’m just looking for a friend with benefits (huh?) No, not sex. A car, nice things, etc. Get your mind drain.

As always, we had a lot of fun putting together this list. We know we’ve missed some BIG lines of dirty talk, so feel free to comment on some of your favorite posts.

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